I'm sitting here wondering what to type. I want my thoughts to have a proper prose to them. At the same time though, I want to just type with my eyes closed and see where it goes from there. When you let the mind wander long enough maybe it'll go places you never expected. You know, or something deep like that.
Either way, today's thought: why do I bother with women anymore?
Seriously. I'm going to end up contradicting myself probably because I've been drilling into my head that I'm not just a "nice guy" or some shit.
I'm pissed off. Every girl I talk to or try to get anywhere with doesn't reciprocate any interest. Maybe I'm just doing it wrong and if I am, someone should teach me because holy fuck.
I'm getting ditched out, I get told okay, then no right before. Different girls, same fucking shit. I hate women. I feel I know I'm going after the wrong ones, but I still see no right ones.
I feel my life is supposed to be much different than this right now. I can't seem to shake that something will happen. But nothing does. Every time I come to blog because of a girl, or some shit. I feel lonely, depressed, this is the wall I talk to when no one's around. Because there is never anyone around.
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That's what I wrote yesterday, I'm starting to feel more and more depressed and stressed out, it's hard not to focus on it when it seems to be affecting my ability to preform most of my basic tasks and my ability at playing games.
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