Country Crazies

Every day I tell myself : Only two more months.

I can't help myself from waking up at noon. This might be because I'm staying up till 2 or 3, but I used to do that and still be able to wake up at 9 or 10 and be fine. I need to set an alarm.

I'm into my routine of working out again, which is awesome. I'm watching what I'm eating, excluding today...my sister makes the best cookies. Right now I'm on hole 6 of my big belt, and hole 1 of my small belt (the belt that didn't fit me at all when I first started). Boost of confidence there. Brushing my teeth more regularly, I swear, every time I sleep over at a place I lose my rhythm so I just have to mimic the brushing when I sleep over, or bring my toothbrush, I guess that makes more sense.

Anyways I'm feeling a bit better now that I realize what I just typed. I still have to go biking and learn some french but baby steps...again, I must stick with my rhythm and my routine. It's not that hard, I actually enjoy lifting my weights, I just think of people I'd like to beat the crap out of when I'm lifting.

Other than that I can safely say I'm probably going crazy out of boredom, I'm doing my best to constantly play games or watch interesting TV to keep my mind going. I'd like to go for a walk at night but it seems ridiculous scary to me. Not only that but my mind likes to think up lots of fucked up things that could get me while I'm out there (or even when I'm in the house). Walking around the house at night when everything is dark, thinking something is just down the hall or across the room, standing in the darkness slowly moving towards me, that's what I'm thinking of.

What else? Still wish I had a girlfriend, buts that's normal. That's a lot of the reason for the whole "two more months" thing. I go to college, I meet people, people I could possibly have a decent relationship with, I can start to do things again, I'll have money hopefully. In two months my problems go away, I just hate waiting.

I guess that's it. Ugh.
-Marz